there’s a sort of internal struggle with balance & contrast in a very specific but very large area of my life that has been quite a strain on my most important relationships and my own sense of well-being. sometimes it causes me to act out. sometimes it causes me to send off serious “leave me the hell alone” vibes. other times it’s an addictive obsession.
so for as much as i’ll never let go of certain hermitudinal ways in the interest of self-preservation, i must admit it feels amazing to have more than a couple rooms occupied as of late, extended stay. it may be a bit premature to say, but i always knew this could work, i never lost faith. it’s the future, the next dimension. infinite love repeated all through nature, art & music, you & me, us.
what comes next is the trickier part i suppose. the meshing, the combining. will it blend? will it break? see, it’s not my choice alone. but i do feel stronger and more content, because at least now i know it’s possible. it will happen, someday. settling is definitely not an option.
three, maybe four…who knows, maybe more.
“wait for me, please hang around…”
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