Archives for posts with tag: opposites

we live in a world that sees time as a solid structure. but i’ve never been able to see it from that perspective. to me, time is a metaphor – a fluid & transient relativity.

i thought this was a weakness, because that’s what i had always been told. over & over. made to pay for it.

why do we try to change the very things about people that make them unique? why don’t we fondly & easily embrace quirks? plus, we sometimes want a square peg to fit in a round hole.

well, they do matter. every bit as much as the demographics we think we want. and probably more.

it’s true that we only know “good” as good as we’ve had it. in chocolate, in whiskey…and in love. and this makes us cynical sometimes. it also makes us dwell. settle.

what i give her is included.

but she polishes it.

i say, “how can you do that?”

she says, “it doesn’t really take any work. just a little love.”

(i’ll leave it at that, because i like the way eden ahbez said it, best.)

“you’ll ever learn…”

by JTW
©2011 JTW “jtwhitaker.com” All rights reserved.

when we love, we wish to hold hands and walk side by side through the twists & turns of life, strengthening each-other during the downs and celebrating each-other during the ups.

but we travelers will, at times, reach a narrow crawlspace.  a place where our tight grip on each-other must be relinquished.  one must crouch down and kiss the dirt floor – shimmying through the tight crevices of personal growth.

when confronted by these passageways, we want to carry our loved one through.  we try to force them onto our backs.  we try to squeeze inside with them.  but we cannot…

he’s at this place now.  i’ll help him bend his knees and crouch low.  he enters through the portal, and I can no longer see him…

following an alternate route, i pass by him, to wait on the other side.

i see healing plants growing around the space where i hope he will emerge.  i gather the herbs and begin making a poultice.  when he limps out – having survived the tests alone – i will spread it over him and soothe his scraped knees and bruised elbows.  i will kiss him with lips of refreshment and cradle his heart in the bandages of my love…

…whole then, we will stand up together, gripping each-other tight, and carry on.

“sail on…sail on by…”

by JTW
©2010 JTW “jtwhitaker.com” All rights reserved.


i’m known for wearing flip flops at inappropriate times; it’s my signature you might say. some people think you should never wear flip flops. i think you should almost always wear them. you know that feeling you get when your feet are in the sand at the beach? or you’re running bare-footed through a soft grassy lawn? it’s being connected to the earth without any barriers that gives you that feeling. flip flops are the second best thing.

anyway, it’s only 48+/- degrees F out today, but i still wore my flip flops on my walk this morning. i needed to be “connected.” and today i did my walk backwards from the usual direction and paths i take. i did it all opposite.

why on the cusp of a revelation do we sometimes return to what wasn’t working? why, when we’re just about to climb out, do we sink back into the ruts we’ve spent years digging?

you know the answer as well as i do – fear.

i believe people are fundamentally afraid of being alone. and that fear often affects more than we realize. it’s why we stay in toxic relationships, it’s why we allow our children (or parents) to get away with certain things, and it’s why we return to destructive behaviors or jobs we hate. when you’re ready to face the truth, and trace all the lines back to the beginning, it always starts with fear of being alone.

there is only one way to break that cycle. let go of fear. sounds so easy, but it’s not. i think we hardly ever really do it. because to let go of the fear means we have to let our feet touch the fires of hell. and it takes a tremendous amount of faith & trust…mostly faith & trust in our deepest fibers being able to rise back anew, better.

“Ridin’ high I got tears in my eyes; you know you got to go through hell before you get to heaven…”

by JTW
©2010 JTW “jtwhitaker.com” All rights reserved.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 67 other followers