i wrote this song about 10 months ago. it is about drug abuse.

Blizzard
12.21.2009

There’s white powder outside, dug two out today
The orange cones are pathetic & just in the way
Dinner was nice but seemed all too “just right”
The cold wind blew and the rest took to flight

The paranoia comes in and there’s no reason or why
The white powder is pretty but what if I die?
Can you plow this for me, do you think you’re that strong?
If I told you I loved you, if I wrote you a song?

24 inches fell down but still there’s no ice
The lights there look pretty but the chill really bites
Why couldn’t you come forward, is it really all that bad?
Theres no time to skate anyway and everyone’s mad

The paranoia comes in and there’s no reason or why
The white powder is pretty but not if we die
Can you plow this for me, do you think you’re that strong?
If I told you I loved you, if I wrote you a song?

Weather always changes, soon it’ll be spring again
The salt melts away and forgiveness comes in
Still the mounds take their toll and some things never fly
But if the past is all we have then why even try?

The paranoia comes in and there’s no reason or why
The white powder was pretty but I’m not gonna die
You can plow this for me, if you think you’re that strong
I told you I loved you and I wrote you this song

The paranoia sets in and there’s no reason or why
The white powder was helpful but I ain’t gonna die
Won’t you plow this for me? I know you’re that strong
I loved you so much that I wrote you this song

The paranoia came in but I said goodbye
The white powder dried up and I’m still alive
The plow was my own, the strength was in me

It just took the white powder to let me believe

i’ve been clean now for two weeks.

i should have seen it sooner. the paranoia, the delusions of grandeur, the reclusiveness i was seeking. only a few people know how bad it really got. and i love them for sticking it out with me. for following me “down the yellow brick road” as i always say.

what was i afraid of in that picture? of not being whole without drugs. of losing my power without the medication.

let me tell you, concentration is overrated.

i wouldn’t take stimulant medication again for all the coffee in columbia. and i love coffee. i love the taste of it – it doesn’t really do much else for me anymore…all those synapses have been twisted & fried.

guess what? i didn’t need it. i don’t need it. i write as much as i did then. if anything, i write better. at least now the general public can read it and know what the heck i’m talking about it. don’t get me wrong – i’m fundamentally a poet – i love ambiguity and i’ll never stop writing it. but it’s not all i want to write. i love writing these narrative pieces too.

bottom line is, let’s face it – should all drugs be illegal? should some drugs that are legal be illegal? should marijuana be legal?

LOL, i don’t know. i’m just a poor washed up writer.

but here’s what i think – ask the people around you. take a good hard look at what the medication is really doing to your life. is it fixing one problem but causing 20 bigger ones? be honest with yourself.

some things are worse than a lack of concentration.

i’ve been clean almost two weeks now.

thank God.
(and all of you who helped me to “quit”)

this is not a happy song. but it’s DEAD ON.





by JTW
©2010 JTW “jtwhitaker.com” All rights reserved.